For a different type of DDD . . .

Guest Post: Rodion

Have you ever noticed that Dagas gets dead or depressed often? Trust me she does. So, instead of having another round of her characters saying mean things about Dagas, she's decided to put me on introspection duty. She might feel better, she might not after this, and she's human, so who could guess.

The cause of dead Dagas is something very intangible but something very real to her, the feeling of inferiority. She has to be the best; she has to know that there's someone out there who loves her, appreciates her, is proud of her, or who can at least tolerate her presence. But she is so unsure of herself, especially around other people that she hides and feigns apathy. What she doesn't realize is that this turns other people off. Who can really love you, if you're not willing to open yourself up to them.

There's a paranoia behind what most people might see as a confident exterior. She feels like other people laugh at her, think she's an idiot, essentially tear her to parts when she's not looking. It's why she prefers to be told up front if she's annoying or being too much of a control freak, otherwise she just plain thinks that not only do you find her annoying but you don't respect her enough to even tell her to back away. No this makes no sense, but humans don't really make sense when you think about it.

Anyway, this summer is particularly tough on her. Not only does she lack the confidence to approach people about finding jobs, but she's also discouraged because she believes that most people aren't going to hire high-school seniors leaving for college in the fall. Add that to the fact that her account, which has taken ten or so years to build up will be gone within the summer.

Damn it, she's crying. This can't be good. I'm supposed to help her keep perspective on things.

You could be powerful Dagas. I've seen the very few times when you truly have your mind on the task at hand. I mean, you're not completely powerless. All of your graduation money is going into your account. You are going to have a job on the U of I campus next semester. And you will succeed in college.

There are a few things in your emotional state that do help you. You're optimistic for one, with the intrisic belief that if you can just hang in there, everything will work out eventually. And you do have enough insight to know when you need to pull back from the world and get better. You need to clean yourself off, put yourself together and carry on.

End of Guest Post

Oh goody, distraction. Megumi just got on.

Over and out.