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dagas_isaNote: This entry contains discussion of a specific "issue" fanfic, and the deliberate thought processes that were involved in creating it. It's sort of in response to this post by princessofgeeks. The "issue" discussed and used as an example is suicide, and thus could possibly be triggering for some.
While I think a lot of fic can really work as "issue fic" which deals with a specific Important Issue, or "meta fic" which is really about talking about the canon at a meta level, there's really one fic I really deliberately wrote to be "meta fic" and that also kind of doubles as "issue fic."
"What Is and What Should Never Be"
Basic summary: After the death of her father, and a poorly-timed round of the Liar Game, Nao attempts suicide, and Akiyama has to prevent history from repeating itself.
Conception
In all seriousness, I noticed the meta intellectually. “Hey, there are two spots where Nao mentions/thinks that she doesn't know what she'd do if she had to deal with that debt, and Akiyama has reactions to that. We know Akiyama's backstory. Maybe that's implying something. Or at least, Akiyama has made that connection in his mind.”
And then that intellectual meta...well, it kind of punched me in the stomach. “What if Nao actually did try to commit suicide.” And like a good strong fic-type stomach punch it bothered me until I decided to wrap my head around it (and thus inflict it on someone else). I could have written straight-on essay!meta about this, but I decided that fic would be more effective in getting across both the intellectual meta and the resulting emotional sucker punch that it implied.
Process
Thankfully, I don't actually do this while actually writing a fic, but this internal dialogue pretty well illustrated my thought process that when from the initial issue/concept to the actual writing/plotting of the story. The bolded parts are pretty much things that became integral to the way I chose my scenario and wrote the story, and how I'm evaluating it for its effectiveness.
“Suicide is an important thematic element in Liar Game, and I think it's something that provides tension in the Akiyama-Nao dynamic, but it's always under the surface. I want to draw it out and talk about that.”
“Okay. So how do we do that?”
“I guess first, we'd have to create a situation where suicide is going to be out there and impossible for the characters to ignore. For example, what would happen if Nao committed suicide?”
“She wouldn't!”
“But say we could justify the situation with bits from the canon. I mean she is already going through an incredibly stressful situation with the Liar Game, she's deeply in debt as a result, she's having to deal with living on her own, her father is sick, and with the exception of Akiyama, we don't know if she has another person providing support. So it wouldn't be entirely unreasonable.”
“Okay...maybe not...but I still can't see it. She'd never do such a thing to Akiyama, since she knows his past. Plus she's incredibly strong and resilient, there's no way she'd want to die. So her wanting to die would be completely out of character.”
“I agree, self. So, let's address those characterization points, and show her reactions to what she did afterward.”
“But she's committing suicide. You can't show her reacting afterward, unless you're going to be dealing with an afterlife of some sort, but it would totally destroy the verisimilitude of the whole thing. Plus, it would be so annoying to hear her angst about what she's done, after she's gone and done that to Akiyama.”
“True. True. But what if it were written as an attempted suicide? Nao “successfully” committing suicide would be the worst possible scenario to write and tragic, but what if we didn't write the worst-case scenario? What if we wrote a scenario, where she attempted suicide, but still had a chance to live?”
“And what would that do?”
“Well, then we could bring Akiyama into it. He could actually do something about the situation besides angst over it. Plus this is something that we know affects him personally in canon, so we could really use this to explore his own feelings not just about Nao, but about the lasting effects of his mother's suicide. This would really work from his POV, and we both know how much I like the emo-porn.”
“Okay, so we've got Akiyama's POV, but how do we know that it's going to be in-character. I know he's stoic and all, but this is something that affects him.”
“Let's do some research! We've got the stuff from his back story, and the one-shot about his time in college. Plus we can look at the effects of suicide on survivors, and listen to some of the real stories that are out there.”
“But we don't need to make this the Liar Game version of 'My Very Special Fic about Suicide'”
“No, no of course not. That would suck, and I think my readers already know that suicide is a Very Serious issue. So no need to bash them over the head with statistics about the rates of suicide among survivors of suicide, but we should know that, because that will inform Akiyama's reactions and make them seem genuine.”
*scampers off to do research*
“Wow...that's a lot of information, and you're telling me that you're not going to use it at all. Some of this stuff is important, and people should know this.”
“But you think, when Akiyama is faced with this situation that he's going to be repeating facts about suicide off the top of his head. I know he's good with the explanations and all, but he's going to be crushed—devastated—throughout 90% of the fic, and the other 10% trying to figure out a way to keep this from happening again. Or he'll do both at the same time.”
“But he's so stoic. I can't imagine him yelling out or crying. He's not one for melodramatics.”
“So let's write the devastation as an quiet and internal process. Something that would let him remain outwardly calm, but show him disassociating. And when he releases the pent up feelings, have him do the bulk of it somewhere privately and with quiet intensity, so that he's the one who remains in control. That sounds like Akiyama, right? Private person. Quietly intense. That way it's really about Akiyama dealing with Nao attempting suicide, not a story about Suicide that has Akiyama and Nao in it.”
“Okay, so we can do Akiyama in character, but what about Nao? Hello. We both think the girl is a fucking powerhouse. No way that someone like her is so depressed that she'd kill herself. You know that most of those statistics say the rate of mental illness in people who attempt suicide is...”
“Fuck the statistics. I think Kanzaki Nao's situation is probably desperate enough that most reasonable people would at least entertain suicide as an option. Plus, she shouldn't fall into a stereotypical idea of a suicidal person because it doesn't fit who she is. We can write it as one moment where her pain outweighed her ability to cope. We can make it clear that she really does want to live, even though her situation is so overwhelming.”
“So, she's going to live, then? Isn't that a cop-out?”
“Not really. Well, yeah, it's nice if she lives because there can be sequels dealing with the fallout, and imagining what happens next. And I can avoid writing a character death. But if we're trying to explore Akiyama's psyche, we already know what happens when someone close to him commits suicide. So why not see what he does when he actually has a chance to stop that history from repeating? And since he's going to be devastated, why not give him a bone, and let him succeed? Plus, then there's an actual emotional arc, and not just going down, down, down.”
“So then if she lives, there's no consequences. And she get's Akiyama mooning over her. And you're planning on having them move in together at the end. Aren't worried about romanticizing this Very Important Issue?”
“Okay, yes, I am worried about making this seem like a big romantic moment, which is why, even though Akiyama/Nao is my OTP, this should be a genfic. In fact, I should probably put in hints that this actually harmed/complicated their relationship, and thus her act did have consequences, just maybe not the ones people expect.”
“All right, then, but aren't you worried about offending or hurting people that have been touched by this personally? And aren't you too anti-social to actually ask someone if this is offensive? Plus this could be totally triggering”
“Okay. So, I'll get it beta-read at least and tell my beta to look for those problems specifically. That way if it seems flippant or over-dramatic, they'll say something. Plus, it'll help me make sure that my story. As far as the triggering goes, I'll warn for it ahead of time.” And if someone who has been there tells me that it's wrong or disrespectful, I'll at least listen to them, even if I don't know how to fix it.
*writes story, gets it betaed, posts it, etc, and looks over the reviews a few months later*
“So, self, did you think that story worked?”
“Well, looking at the reviews, the emotional impact definitely hit. Many people commented at how in-character Akiyama was, and while a lot of people commented that they couldn't see Nao ever committing suicide, they either saw the gravity of her situation, or thought that she was as in-character as she could be in this situation. There were also a few mentions of people thinking about the emotional effects of the Liar Game. So yeah, on a fanfic level and maybe a meta level, it worked. As an added bonus, no one's told me how romantic it was, or insulted Nao for what she did.”
“But say, someone who wasn't familiar with the fandom came in and read your story, it would still seem all Lifetime-y wouldn't it?”
“Yeah, probably. If someone came in and read it who was unfamiliar with Akiyama's past, or Akiyama and Nao's canon characterization, they'd probably get lost. But then, as fanfiction and as meta, it's really something that needs supported by canon. Maybe it really is a good and moving story about suicide, even for someone unfamiliar with the fandom, but I'm not sure that's I should worry too much if it isn't as long as it works as fanfiction.”
"Oh."
Fin
So, I don't think it was really that clear-cut when I was actually writing it, but within the process of writing it (as well as deliberately keeping the style very stark) those were all issues/concerns/decisions that came up in choosing what direction the story would go into. I'm still sorting out if/how this is really any different from how I approach more 'trivial' fic, besides the extra time and thought that went into its conception.
princessofgeeks. The "issue" discussed and used as an example is suicide, and thus could possibly be triggering for some.While I think a lot of fic can really work as "issue fic" which deals with a specific Important Issue, or "meta fic" which is really about talking about the canon at a meta level, there's really one fic I really deliberately wrote to be "meta fic" and that also kind of doubles as "issue fic."
"What Is and What Should Never Be"
Basic summary: After the death of her father, and a poorly-timed round of the Liar Game, Nao attempts suicide, and Akiyama has to prevent history from repeating itself.
Conception
In all seriousness, I noticed the meta intellectually. “Hey, there are two spots where Nao mentions/thinks that she doesn't know what she'd do if she had to deal with that debt, and Akiyama has reactions to that. We know Akiyama's backstory. Maybe that's implying something. Or at least, Akiyama has made that connection in his mind.”
And then that intellectual meta...well, it kind of punched me in the stomach. “What if Nao actually did try to commit suicide.” And like a good strong fic-type stomach punch it bothered me until I decided to wrap my head around it (and thus inflict it on someone else). I could have written straight-on essay!meta about this, but I decided that fic would be more effective in getting across both the intellectual meta and the resulting emotional sucker punch that it implied.
Process
Thankfully, I don't actually do this while actually writing a fic, but this internal dialogue pretty well illustrated my thought process that when from the initial issue/concept to the actual writing/plotting of the story. The bolded parts are pretty much things that became integral to the way I chose my scenario and wrote the story, and how I'm evaluating it for its effectiveness.
“Suicide is an important thematic element in Liar Game, and I think it's something that provides tension in the Akiyama-Nao dynamic, but it's always under the surface. I want to draw it out and talk about that.”
“Okay. So how do we do that?”
“I guess first, we'd have to create a situation where suicide is going to be out there and impossible for the characters to ignore. For example, what would happen if Nao committed suicide?”
“She wouldn't!”
“But say we could justify the situation with bits from the canon. I mean she is already going through an incredibly stressful situation with the Liar Game, she's deeply in debt as a result, she's having to deal with living on her own, her father is sick, and with the exception of Akiyama, we don't know if she has another person providing support. So it wouldn't be entirely unreasonable.”
“Okay...maybe not...but I still can't see it. She'd never do such a thing to Akiyama, since she knows his past. Plus she's incredibly strong and resilient, there's no way she'd want to die. So her wanting to die would be completely out of character.”
“I agree, self. So, let's address those characterization points, and show her reactions to what she did afterward.”
“But she's committing suicide. You can't show her reacting afterward, unless you're going to be dealing with an afterlife of some sort, but it would totally destroy the verisimilitude of the whole thing. Plus, it would be so annoying to hear her angst about what she's done, after she's gone and done that to Akiyama.”
“True. True. But what if it were written as an attempted suicide? Nao “successfully” committing suicide would be the worst possible scenario to write and tragic, but what if we didn't write the worst-case scenario? What if we wrote a scenario, where she attempted suicide, but still had a chance to live?”
“And what would that do?”
“Well, then we could bring Akiyama into it. He could actually do something about the situation besides angst over it. Plus this is something that we know affects him personally in canon, so we could really use this to explore his own feelings not just about Nao, but about the lasting effects of his mother's suicide. This would really work from his POV, and we both know how much I like the emo-porn.”
“Okay, so we've got Akiyama's POV, but how do we know that it's going to be in-character. I know he's stoic and all, but this is something that affects him.”
“Let's do some research! We've got the stuff from his back story, and the one-shot about his time in college. Plus we can look at the effects of suicide on survivors, and listen to some of the real stories that are out there.”
“But we don't need to make this the Liar Game version of 'My Very Special Fic about Suicide'”
“No, no of course not. That would suck, and I think my readers already know that suicide is a Very Serious issue. So no need to bash them over the head with statistics about the rates of suicide among survivors of suicide, but we should know that, because that will inform Akiyama's reactions and make them seem genuine.”
*scampers off to do research*
“Wow...that's a lot of information, and you're telling me that you're not going to use it at all. Some of this stuff is important, and people should know this.”
“But you think, when Akiyama is faced with this situation that he's going to be repeating facts about suicide off the top of his head. I know he's good with the explanations and all, but he's going to be crushed—devastated—throughout 90% of the fic, and the other 10% trying to figure out a way to keep this from happening again. Or he'll do both at the same time.”
“But he's so stoic. I can't imagine him yelling out or crying. He's not one for melodramatics.”
“So let's write the devastation as an quiet and internal process. Something that would let him remain outwardly calm, but show him disassociating. And when he releases the pent up feelings, have him do the bulk of it somewhere privately and with quiet intensity, so that he's the one who remains in control. That sounds like Akiyama, right? Private person. Quietly intense. That way it's really about Akiyama dealing with Nao attempting suicide, not a story about Suicide that has Akiyama and Nao in it.”
“Okay, so we can do Akiyama in character, but what about Nao? Hello. We both think the girl is a fucking powerhouse. No way that someone like her is so depressed that she'd kill herself. You know that most of those statistics say the rate of mental illness in people who attempt suicide is...”
“Fuck the statistics. I think Kanzaki Nao's situation is probably desperate enough that most reasonable people would at least entertain suicide as an option. Plus, she shouldn't fall into a stereotypical idea of a suicidal person because it doesn't fit who she is. We can write it as one moment where her pain outweighed her ability to cope. We can make it clear that she really does want to live, even though her situation is so overwhelming.”
“So, she's going to live, then? Isn't that a cop-out?”
“Not really. Well, yeah, it's nice if she lives because there can be sequels dealing with the fallout, and imagining what happens next. And I can avoid writing a character death. But if we're trying to explore Akiyama's psyche, we already know what happens when someone close to him commits suicide. So why not see what he does when he actually has a chance to stop that history from repeating? And since he's going to be devastated, why not give him a bone, and let him succeed? Plus, then there's an actual emotional arc, and not just going down, down, down.”
“So then if she lives, there's no consequences. And she get's Akiyama mooning over her. And you're planning on having them move in together at the end. Aren't worried about romanticizing this Very Important Issue?”
“Okay, yes, I am worried about making this seem like a big romantic moment, which is why, even though Akiyama/Nao is my OTP, this should be a genfic. In fact, I should probably put in hints that this actually harmed/complicated their relationship, and thus her act did have consequences, just maybe not the ones people expect.”
“All right, then, but aren't you worried about offending or hurting people that have been touched by this personally? And aren't you too anti-social to actually ask someone if this is offensive? Plus this could be totally triggering”
“Okay. So, I'll get it beta-read at least and tell my beta to look for those problems specifically. That way if it seems flippant or over-dramatic, they'll say something. Plus, it'll help me make sure that my story. As far as the triggering goes, I'll warn for it ahead of time.” And if someone who has been there tells me that it's wrong or disrespectful, I'll at least listen to them, even if I don't know how to fix it.
*writes story, gets it betaed, posts it, etc, and looks over the reviews a few months later*
“So, self, did you think that story worked?”
“Well, looking at the reviews, the emotional impact definitely hit. Many people commented at how in-character Akiyama was, and while a lot of people commented that they couldn't see Nao ever committing suicide, they either saw the gravity of her situation, or thought that she was as in-character as she could be in this situation. There were also a few mentions of people thinking about the emotional effects of the Liar Game. So yeah, on a fanfic level and maybe a meta level, it worked. As an added bonus, no one's told me how romantic it was, or insulted Nao for what she did.”
“But say, someone who wasn't familiar with the fandom came in and read your story, it would still seem all Lifetime-y wouldn't it?”
“Yeah, probably. If someone came in and read it who was unfamiliar with Akiyama's past, or Akiyama and Nao's canon characterization, they'd probably get lost. But then, as fanfiction and as meta, it's really something that needs supported by canon. Maybe it really is a good and moving story about suicide, even for someone unfamiliar with the fandom, but I'm not sure that's I should worry too much if it isn't as long as it works as fanfiction.”
"Oh."
Fin
So, I don't think it was really that clear-cut when I was actually writing it, but within the process of writing it (as well as deliberately keeping the style very stark) those were all issues/concerns/decisions that came up in choosing what direction the story would go into. I'm still sorting out if/how this is really any different from how I approach more 'trivial' fic, besides the extra time and thought that went into its conception.
