Take a ride on the roller coaster
Sep. 16th, 2003 11:37 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
dagas_isaJust a warning for everyone: I'm fine one moment and a wreck the next. I'll honestly try to be fine when I'm online, but I've been a wreck.
Would you miss me if I were to disappear?
Just a random question.
Oh, and how's this for irony, Me-chan and I are RP a conversation between Iraki and Rodion, and we're essentially re-enacting a conversation we had earlier that day, but with switched roles. Extremely interesting and annoying that be. But funny as all out. ^_^
HikaruYui: Iraki: *timidly* Did something ask for me to come?
DagasIsa: Rodion: *looks at her* You look lost.
HikaruYui: Iraki: Lost? Maybe...
DagasIsa: Rodion: *approaches her* Do you need help?
HikaruYui: Iraki: *looks down* There's nothing really anyone can do. Don't worry about me.
DagasIsa: Rodion: *tilts her head up, and forces her to look in his eyes* What happened?
HikaruYui: Iraki: *takes a step back* I'm a failure. I useless failure. That's all.
DagasIsa: Rodion: *in a soft voice* No, no, not a failure. And not useless.
HikaruYui: Iraki: *tries to shake her head* You shouldn't say that.
DagasIsa: Rodion: I see the destinies of people as clearly as the people themselves. You are very important to this world.
HikaruYui: Iraki: *bitterly* Likely I'll be instrumental in hurting it.
DagasIsa: Rodion: *shakes head*Only if you want to.
HikaruYui: Iraki: I can't help hurting the things I love.
DagasIsa: Rodion: Let's sit down somewhere and talk.
HikaruYui: Iraki: Why?
DagasIsa: Rodion: Because I would feel a lot better if I could talk to you.
HikaruYui: Iraki: Don't worry about me. I don't deserve it.
DagasIsa: Rodion: Would it make you feel better if I told you that I'm doing this for the sake of the world.
HikaruYui: Iraki: It's up to you anyway.
DagasIsa: Rodion: *sits down on a bench* Then sit down and tell me what's bothering you.
HikaruYui: Iraki: *sits next to him* I've...I've just lost everything, and it's all my fault
DagasIsa: Rodion: *nods*
HikaruYui: Iraki: I had a mission
HikaruYui: Iraki: And I failed miserably
DagasIsa: Rodion: I see. What was the mission?
HikaruYui: Iraki: I was supposed to follow someone.
DagasIsa: Rodion: *nods*
HikaruYui: Iraki: And I had a weapon I was supposed to hold onto.
HikaruYui: Iraki: And now the enemy has the weapon, and the person I was following could be anywhere in the universe
DagasIsa: Rodion: I understand.
HikaruYui: Iraki: I failed. Completely.
HikaruYui: Iraki: *starts to cry, but tries to wipe away the tears*
DagasIsa: Rodion: There's a funny thing about destiny though. Even when we think we fail, there's always the possibility for it to cause something even better to happen as a result.
DagasIsa: Rodion: *wraps his arm around Iraki*
HikaruYui: Iraki: *stiffens* Don't. I don't deserve sympathy.
DagasIsa: Rodion: *ignores her* All lost souls deserve sympathy.
HikaruYui: Iraki: *shakes head* No...
DagasIsa: Rodion: Yes, you do. There are people who still need you, who still care about you, even if things didn't go as planned.
HikaruYui: Iraki: No one needs me. I'm sure he'd be fine. I think...I think something must have happened anyway...
DagasIsa: Rodion: Yes, there are people who need you. An entire destiny rides on your shoulders, and only you can fulfill your destiny. And what about this 'he,' I'm sure that if something happened to him, he'll need you.
HikaruYui: Iraki: Nothing can depend on me. If it did, then I would fail.
DagasIsa: Rodion: And why do you say that?
DagasIsa: (I was going to have him say Don't say that, but then it would sound scarily familiar)
HikaruYui: (lol!)
HikaruYui: Iraki: Because I haven't been able to do a thing. This whole time, I've tried as hard as I could, and I've failed at absolutely everything!
DagasIsa: Rodion: How do you know that what you think is a failure isn't going to end up being a success in the end?
HikaruYui: Iraki: I failed the mission.
DagasIsa: Rodion: Don't think about the mission. Think about the goals. What do you want in the long term?
HikaruYui: Iraki: But Kiru sent me on the mission!
HikaruYui: Iraki: I failed him.
DagasIsa: Rodion: Kiru?
HikaruYui: Iraki: *sobs* Yes, Kiru...I failed him.
DagasIsa: Rodion: Who is Kiru?
HikaruYui: Iraki: Kiru is...the one most important person to me in the world. Even if I could never say...
DagasIsa: Rodion: Say what?
HikaruYui: Iraki: I couldn't ever tell him.
DagasIsa: Rodion: What couldn't you tell him?
HikaruYui: Iraki: That I cared about him. We couldn't say a thing.
HikaruYui: Iraki: And now something's happened to him. And I've failed him!
HikaruYui: Iraki: How could I ever face him?
DagasIsa: Rodion: He would understand.
DagasIsa: Rodion: He understood that you cared about him, even if you never said the words. One failure isn't going to stop that.
HikaruYui: Iraki: But I don't deserve him.
DagasIsa: Rodion: Of course he does.
DagasIsa: Of course you deserve him.
HikaruYui: Iraki: *shakes head* No! I don't!
DagasIsa: Rodion: Everyone deserves someone they can lean on.
HikaruYui: Iraki: Why do you say that?
DagasIsa: Rodion: I have seen a lot of things, and I know that people need someone to lean on or else they fall into darkness. I doubt that your Kiru would want to see that happen to you.
HikaruYui: Iraki: Darkness...I can't fall into darkness
DagasIsa: Rodion: See, you deserve to have someone to lean on.
HikaruYui: Iraki: *shakes head* No, it's impossible for me. My heart is protected. I cant even escape my failure that way
DagasIsa: Rodion: Protected from what?
HikaruYui: Iraki: From the darkness
DagasIsa: Rodion: Are you sure?
HikaruYui: Iraki: *hesitantly* Yes...
DagasIsa: Rodion: Not quite sure, hmm...
DagasIsa: Rodion: Do not look at the darkness as an escape.
HikaruYui: Iraki: *is silent*
DagasIsa: Rodion: There are those who still care about you, even if you can't bring yourself to care about you.
DagasIsa: Rodion: Look to them for support.
HikaruYui: Iraki: *quietly* How can I ask anyone for anything after how I've failed?
DagasIsa: Rodion: Because your value to them is not based on whether you succeed at some abstract goal,but because you are a person.
HikaruYui: Iraki: He is too important. I can't risk hurting him for me.
DagasIsa: Rodion: He loves you. Seeing you hurt and not leaning on him would probably hurt him more.
DagasIsa: (This is creepy ^_^)
HikaruYui: (Yeah!)
DagasIsa: (You realize we're rping a conversation similar to one's we've had but with the roles reversed ^_^)
DagasIsa: (Anyway, your move)
HikaruYui: Iraki: I can't bring him down with my problems.
HikaruYui: Iraki: And...I may not see him again anyway.
DagasIsa: Rodion: You will. And for someone who cares about you, they would rather know about your problems.
HikaruYui: Iraki: I'll see him? But how do you know?
DagasIsa: Rodion: I see the strands of human destiny.
HikaruYui: Iraki: But...can you really be sure?
DagasIsa: Rodion: If you want to see him again, you'll see him. I'm sure about this.
HikaruYui: Iraki: *has stopped crying* So then...my role isn't over? I'll find them again?
DagasIsa: Rodion: No, it's not over yet.
HikaruYui: Iraki: But what can I do? I'm worthless in everything...
DagasIsa: Rodion: You can believe in those around you. You can support them, and let them support you.
HikaruYui: Iraki: But I'm all alone...
DagasIsa: Rodion: You are never really alone.
DagasIsa: (Ph34r, there is bad KH rhetoric coming up)
HikaruYui: Iraki: I am. I lost them. I couldn't protect the world! It was destroyed because of me!
DagasIsa: Rodion: As long as you have your friends inside your heart, you'll never be alone.
DagasIsa: Rodion: You will find your friends again.
HikaruYui: Iraki: I...hope so. If I can even face them....
DagasIsa: Rodion: You can face them.
HikaruYui: Iraki: Why are you saying this to me?
DagasIsa: Rodion: Because I believe in you.
HikaruYui: Iraki: But why? There's nothing about me to believe in!
DagasIsa: Rodion: You have a heart right? I can believe in that. You have people who care about you, and you care about them as well.
DagasIsa: Rodion: There is plenty for you to believe in.
HikaruYui: Iraki: But what am I to you for you to say this?
DagasIsa: Rodion: You look like a lost soul.
HikaruYui: Iraki: A lost soul?
DagasIsa: Rodion: Someone who needs a bit of comfort.
HikaruYui: Iraki: I still don't deserve this.
DagasIsa: Rodion: Yes you do.
DagasIsa: Rodion: Everyone deserves comfort.
HikaruYui: Iraki: But why are you doing this?
DagasIsa: Rodion: *small smile* Because if I didn't comfort those who were lost, then I wouldn't be me.
HikaruYui: Iraki: Who are you, anyway?
DagasIsa: Rodion: Just someone. Call me Rodion, if you need a name.
HikaruYui: Iraki: Rodion...
HikaruYui: Iraki: I have to thank you, for doing this for me when I don't deserve anything.
DagasIsa: Rodion: *small smile* We can debate the issue of deserving, but you're welcome.
Over and out.
Would you miss me if I were to disappear?
Just a random question.
Oh, and how's this for irony, Me-chan and I are RP a conversation between Iraki and Rodion, and we're essentially re-enacting a conversation we had earlier that day, but with switched roles. Extremely interesting and annoying that be. But funny as all out. ^_^
HikaruYui: Iraki: *timidly* Did something ask for me to come?
DagasIsa: Rodion: *looks at her* You look lost.
HikaruYui: Iraki: Lost? Maybe...
DagasIsa: Rodion: *approaches her* Do you need help?
HikaruYui: Iraki: *looks down* There's nothing really anyone can do. Don't worry about me.
DagasIsa: Rodion: *tilts her head up, and forces her to look in his eyes* What happened?
HikaruYui: Iraki: *takes a step back* I'm a failure. I useless failure. That's all.
DagasIsa: Rodion: *in a soft voice* No, no, not a failure. And not useless.
HikaruYui: Iraki: *tries to shake her head* You shouldn't say that.
DagasIsa: Rodion: I see the destinies of people as clearly as the people themselves. You are very important to this world.
HikaruYui: Iraki: *bitterly* Likely I'll be instrumental in hurting it.
DagasIsa: Rodion: *shakes head*Only if you want to.
HikaruYui: Iraki: I can't help hurting the things I love.
DagasIsa: Rodion: Let's sit down somewhere and talk.
HikaruYui: Iraki: Why?
DagasIsa: Rodion: Because I would feel a lot better if I could talk to you.
HikaruYui: Iraki: Don't worry about me. I don't deserve it.
DagasIsa: Rodion: Would it make you feel better if I told you that I'm doing this for the sake of the world.
HikaruYui: Iraki: It's up to you anyway.
DagasIsa: Rodion: *sits down on a bench* Then sit down and tell me what's bothering you.
HikaruYui: Iraki: *sits next to him* I've...I've just lost everything, and it's all my fault
DagasIsa: Rodion: *nods*
HikaruYui: Iraki: I had a mission
HikaruYui: Iraki: And I failed miserably
DagasIsa: Rodion: I see. What was the mission?
HikaruYui: Iraki: I was supposed to follow someone.
DagasIsa: Rodion: *nods*
HikaruYui: Iraki: And I had a weapon I was supposed to hold onto.
HikaruYui: Iraki: And now the enemy has the weapon, and the person I was following could be anywhere in the universe
DagasIsa: Rodion: I understand.
HikaruYui: Iraki: I failed. Completely.
HikaruYui: Iraki: *starts to cry, but tries to wipe away the tears*
DagasIsa: Rodion: There's a funny thing about destiny though. Even when we think we fail, there's always the possibility for it to cause something even better to happen as a result.
DagasIsa: Rodion: *wraps his arm around Iraki*
HikaruYui: Iraki: *stiffens* Don't. I don't deserve sympathy.
DagasIsa: Rodion: *ignores her* All lost souls deserve sympathy.
HikaruYui: Iraki: *shakes head* No...
DagasIsa: Rodion: Yes, you do. There are people who still need you, who still care about you, even if things didn't go as planned.
HikaruYui: Iraki: No one needs me. I'm sure he'd be fine. I think...I think something must have happened anyway...
DagasIsa: Rodion: Yes, there are people who need you. An entire destiny rides on your shoulders, and only you can fulfill your destiny. And what about this 'he,' I'm sure that if something happened to him, he'll need you.
HikaruYui: Iraki: Nothing can depend on me. If it did, then I would fail.
DagasIsa: Rodion: And why do you say that?
DagasIsa: (I was going to have him say Don't say that, but then it would sound scarily familiar)
HikaruYui: (lol!)
HikaruYui: Iraki: Because I haven't been able to do a thing. This whole time, I've tried as hard as I could, and I've failed at absolutely everything!
DagasIsa: Rodion: How do you know that what you think is a failure isn't going to end up being a success in the end?
HikaruYui: Iraki: I failed the mission.
DagasIsa: Rodion: Don't think about the mission. Think about the goals. What do you want in the long term?
HikaruYui: Iraki: But Kiru sent me on the mission!
HikaruYui: Iraki: I failed him.
DagasIsa: Rodion: Kiru?
HikaruYui: Iraki: *sobs* Yes, Kiru...I failed him.
DagasIsa: Rodion: Who is Kiru?
HikaruYui: Iraki: Kiru is...the one most important person to me in the world. Even if I could never say...
DagasIsa: Rodion: Say what?
HikaruYui: Iraki: I couldn't ever tell him.
DagasIsa: Rodion: What couldn't you tell him?
HikaruYui: Iraki: That I cared about him. We couldn't say a thing.
HikaruYui: Iraki: And now something's happened to him. And I've failed him!
HikaruYui: Iraki: How could I ever face him?
DagasIsa: Rodion: He would understand.
DagasIsa: Rodion: He understood that you cared about him, even if you never said the words. One failure isn't going to stop that.
HikaruYui: Iraki: But I don't deserve him.
DagasIsa: Rodion: Of course he does.
DagasIsa: Of course you deserve him.
HikaruYui: Iraki: *shakes head* No! I don't!
DagasIsa: Rodion: Everyone deserves someone they can lean on.
HikaruYui: Iraki: Why do you say that?
DagasIsa: Rodion: I have seen a lot of things, and I know that people need someone to lean on or else they fall into darkness. I doubt that your Kiru would want to see that happen to you.
HikaruYui: Iraki: Darkness...I can't fall into darkness
DagasIsa: Rodion: See, you deserve to have someone to lean on.
HikaruYui: Iraki: *shakes head* No, it's impossible for me. My heart is protected. I cant even escape my failure that way
DagasIsa: Rodion: Protected from what?
HikaruYui: Iraki: From the darkness
DagasIsa: Rodion: Are you sure?
HikaruYui: Iraki: *hesitantly* Yes...
DagasIsa: Rodion: Not quite sure, hmm...
DagasIsa: Rodion: Do not look at the darkness as an escape.
HikaruYui: Iraki: *is silent*
DagasIsa: Rodion: There are those who still care about you, even if you can't bring yourself to care about you.
DagasIsa: Rodion: Look to them for support.
HikaruYui: Iraki: *quietly* How can I ask anyone for anything after how I've failed?
DagasIsa: Rodion: Because your value to them is not based on whether you succeed at some abstract goal,but because you are a person.
HikaruYui: Iraki: He is too important. I can't risk hurting him for me.
DagasIsa: Rodion: He loves you. Seeing you hurt and not leaning on him would probably hurt him more.
DagasIsa: (This is creepy ^_^)
HikaruYui: (Yeah!)
DagasIsa: (You realize we're rping a conversation similar to one's we've had but with the roles reversed ^_^)
DagasIsa: (Anyway, your move)
HikaruYui: Iraki: I can't bring him down with my problems.
HikaruYui: Iraki: And...I may not see him again anyway.
DagasIsa: Rodion: You will. And for someone who cares about you, they would rather know about your problems.
HikaruYui: Iraki: I'll see him? But how do you know?
DagasIsa: Rodion: I see the strands of human destiny.
HikaruYui: Iraki: But...can you really be sure?
DagasIsa: Rodion: If you want to see him again, you'll see him. I'm sure about this.
HikaruYui: Iraki: *has stopped crying* So then...my role isn't over? I'll find them again?
DagasIsa: Rodion: No, it's not over yet.
HikaruYui: Iraki: But what can I do? I'm worthless in everything...
DagasIsa: Rodion: You can believe in those around you. You can support them, and let them support you.
HikaruYui: Iraki: But I'm all alone...
DagasIsa: Rodion: You are never really alone.
DagasIsa: (Ph34r, there is bad KH rhetoric coming up)
HikaruYui: Iraki: I am. I lost them. I couldn't protect the world! It was destroyed because of me!
DagasIsa: Rodion: As long as you have your friends inside your heart, you'll never be alone.
DagasIsa: Rodion: You will find your friends again.
HikaruYui: Iraki: I...hope so. If I can even face them....
DagasIsa: Rodion: You can face them.
HikaruYui: Iraki: Why are you saying this to me?
DagasIsa: Rodion: Because I believe in you.
HikaruYui: Iraki: But why? There's nothing about me to believe in!
DagasIsa: Rodion: You have a heart right? I can believe in that. You have people who care about you, and you care about them as well.
DagasIsa: Rodion: There is plenty for you to believe in.
HikaruYui: Iraki: But what am I to you for you to say this?
DagasIsa: Rodion: You look like a lost soul.
HikaruYui: Iraki: A lost soul?
DagasIsa: Rodion: Someone who needs a bit of comfort.
HikaruYui: Iraki: I still don't deserve this.
DagasIsa: Rodion: Yes you do.
DagasIsa: Rodion: Everyone deserves comfort.
HikaruYui: Iraki: But why are you doing this?
DagasIsa: Rodion: *small smile* Because if I didn't comfort those who were lost, then I wouldn't be me.
HikaruYui: Iraki: Who are you, anyway?
DagasIsa: Rodion: Just someone. Call me Rodion, if you need a name.
HikaruYui: Iraki: Rodion...
HikaruYui: Iraki: I have to thank you, for doing this for me when I don't deserve anything.
DagasIsa: Rodion: *small smile* We can debate the issue of deserving, but you're welcome.
Over and out.
