Dramatics and the Dagas
Feb. 28th, 2005 01:07 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
dagas_isaLong entry maybe. I dunno, I just started it, but I feel like I have a lot to say and stuff.
Things are starting to wind back together. I don't get away from the computer much still, but I managed to find out what happened to my rent money (mom accidentally passed it on to my dad's account) and so I'm not kicked out of Newman, which I was scared of when I last posted.
As far as school goes... eh well, I've been having a lot of tests, one last thursday, two today and one tomorrow. But at the same time, I'm starting to feel things come together again in Japanese. The new text book really threw me a curve bell, because things just abrubtly changed from Nakama to this new style. I'm not sure which I like better, although I must admit that this text book is more efficient than my old one >.<
Efficient, eh? Bah.
Haven't talked to many people, although having Megumi call was actually a pleasant surprise in a way. It's been so long... Ohisashiburi ne.
I hate drama in my hobbies, which is why it's been sad having a whole lot of it served up this past week or so. Yesh Dagas has a new boy, yes he's a lot older than she is. Yes, he's the ex-boyfriend of someone else on the linkshell (whose current boyfriend is also in the linkshell, and someone that I'm somewhat friends with) and we can see where this gets convoluted.
I can handle that. Maybe not ideally, but I can handle juggling time with him vs. my LS family/friend ingroup. What I'm having trouble handling is this sort of ... trapped ... feeling.
Anyone who knows me online knows my natural online behavior. I play flirt with just about anyone if I think it's something that we both enjoy. Starry, Arccy, heck I think a lot of people in my old HoP crew know how I behave towards people when I'm in an affectionate mood. And yes, I'm the same way with my linkshell members. I know it's a game. They (hopefully) know it's a game, and we all have fun.
Apparently this is impossile for the boy to handle. So when I /tell him and say that Shisou (silly manthra <333) is hitting on me, and that I'm having fun, he blows up. Okay, so Shisou makes a comment that he can see under my 'skirt' thingie (camera angles and stuff) which leads to me and Amonchan slapping him. And I had a load of fun, until he starts going on asking me about how many people he has. Already he thinks I have something serious going on with Starry and Arccy (umm... I love them both to death but not in a way that would interfere with me having a relationship with someone else) and so when he hears about me 'flirting' with another man, he has a conniption, and I'm trying to explain to him that it's all just a game. And eventually this leads to him logging on me without even saying goodnight, and my getting fed up and so on and so forth.
So ready to end it... I swear... just so ready to end it. Especially when he accuses me of lying. I'll put up with a bit, but when you essentially discredit me as a person, I'm not gonna take it. If you have that opinion of me, we're better off apart... or so I think.
Go fig. The problem is that he doesn't want me to go yet... and for some reason I'm willing to try again.
... baka na dagas desu...
Hmm... huggles to everyone, Happy Belated Birthday to Sabi complete with Cloud molestorizations and nerdy looking guys in glasses who can cook delicious food. =P Love to you all.
Over and out.
Things are starting to wind back together. I don't get away from the computer much still, but I managed to find out what happened to my rent money (mom accidentally passed it on to my dad's account) and so I'm not kicked out of Newman, which I was scared of when I last posted.
As far as school goes... eh well, I've been having a lot of tests, one last thursday, two today and one tomorrow. But at the same time, I'm starting to feel things come together again in Japanese. The new text book really threw me a curve bell, because things just abrubtly changed from Nakama to this new style. I'm not sure which I like better, although I must admit that this text book is more efficient than my old one >.<
Efficient, eh? Bah.
Haven't talked to many people, although having Megumi call was actually a pleasant surprise in a way. It's been so long... Ohisashiburi ne.
I hate drama in my hobbies, which is why it's been sad having a whole lot of it served up this past week or so. Yesh Dagas has a new boy, yes he's a lot older than she is. Yes, he's the ex-boyfriend of someone else on the linkshell (whose current boyfriend is also in the linkshell, and someone that I'm somewhat friends with) and we can see where this gets convoluted.
I can handle that. Maybe not ideally, but I can handle juggling time with him vs. my LS family/friend ingroup. What I'm having trouble handling is this sort of ... trapped ... feeling.
Anyone who knows me online knows my natural online behavior. I play flirt with just about anyone if I think it's something that we both enjoy. Starry, Arccy, heck I think a lot of people in my old HoP crew know how I behave towards people when I'm in an affectionate mood. And yes, I'm the same way with my linkshell members. I know it's a game. They (hopefully) know it's a game, and we all have fun.
Apparently this is impossile for the boy to handle. So when I /tell him and say that Shisou (silly manthra <333) is hitting on me, and that I'm having fun, he blows up. Okay, so Shisou makes a comment that he can see under my 'skirt' thingie (camera angles and stuff) which leads to me and Amonchan slapping him. And I had a load of fun, until he starts going on asking me about how many people he has. Already he thinks I have something serious going on with Starry and Arccy (umm... I love them both to death but not in a way that would interfere with me having a relationship with someone else) and so when he hears about me 'flirting' with another man, he has a conniption, and I'm trying to explain to him that it's all just a game. And eventually this leads to him logging on me without even saying goodnight, and my getting fed up and so on and so forth.
So ready to end it... I swear... just so ready to end it. Especially when he accuses me of lying. I'll put up with a bit, but when you essentially discredit me as a person, I'm not gonna take it. If you have that opinion of me, we're better off apart... or so I think.
Go fig. The problem is that he doesn't want me to go yet... and for some reason I'm willing to try again.
... baka na dagas desu...
Hmm... huggles to everyone, Happy Belated Birthday to Sabi complete with Cloud molestorizations and nerdy looking guys in glasses who can cook delicious food. =P Love to you all.
Over and out.
